JAG:  Musings of a Marine Lieutenant Colonel
by TnJAGAz
Summary: Teeny bit of angst. Ruminations on past and future by a certain Marine Lieutenant Colonel.


Title: Musings of a Marine Lieutenant Colonel

Author: TnJAGAz aka TxJAG_b

Rating: Pretty much G, I think. Maybe a PG word or two.

Classification: Teeny bit of angst; Ruminations past and future.

Spoilers: Anything from 1 to 10, most notably **Fair Winds and Following Seas**

A/N: Blame Editor Karen for this one. She talked in her story, **Mobius Strip**, about Mac missing Harm's cooking and that got me to thinking about what else Mac might miss. So I took the spoiler from the season finale and said what else would Mac think about as she boards that plane for California…happens just after the announcement about Harm going to London but he's also made a promise to Mac – see if you can discern what it is, because it's still daytime at JAG Corps and Harm and Mac haven't had their fateful afternoon meeting yet. When Karen read it, she said - post it - so here it is warts and all.

Disclaimer: The characters in this story are the property of Donald Bellisario, Belisaurius Productions, Paramount Pictures and Columbia Broadcasting Service Entertainment – this story is for non-profit entertainment of JAG fans only. No copyright infringement is intended or implied.

I won't see him anymore.

I won't see his smiling face as he gets out his car in the mornings. That Corvette of his was always shiny and new looking.

I won't be able to walk in with him in the mornings, discussing mundane things like the weather, what he had for dinner last night, whether or not Mattie or Coates called or stopped by.

I won't face him in court or be his second chair or he be mine. Of course, the amount of court time for me is going to dwindle too.

There won't be anymore working lunches or confabs in the break area.

No more lunches at Beltway, Fong's House of Rice, or anywhere else for that matter.

We won't meet anymore out in the bullpen, sharing knowing smiles about Coates. Or shake our heads in amazement at how Bud has really grown up and is now a force to be reckoned with. Or even discuss the many moods of Sturgis. Or look up at those monitors and wonder why the world is as crazy as it is.

We won't save each other's six the way we did in times past. No more adventures in exotic lands for Butch and Sundance. Not together, anyway.

No more of spook boy getting us involved in his hare-brained schemes.

We won't stand side by side in Cresswell's office, listening to him inform us about the newest case we've been assigned or have follow-up on a mission we just completed.

I won't see him casually glance over at me anymore and give me that sly little look or smile of his.

And of course I'll miss those dazzling smiles that knock my socks off.

No more of his leaning against my doorframe and asking me about a case or a witness.

No more last minute plea bargaining sessions.

No more in your face conversations about whether the client is guilty or not.

And then there's the after work stuff;

No more visits to his loft apartment for working dinners or reviewing case notes. Or him visiting mine for the same.

No more weekend movie nights.

No more betting on TV sports.

No more of his luscious dinners. Not even his meatless meatloaf.

No more runs in the park, meetings at the gym or anywhere else for that matter.

He says he'll be temporarily attached to Naval Intelligence in the Force Judge Advocate office in London. Something about tying up loose ends on an old case. London. That's a whole world away from where I'll be in sunny California – at least for the time being. How ironic. He grew up there and now, I'm stationed there.

Some would say it's the end. We'll email each other once or twice and that will be the end of it.

But they don't know what I do.

He said he loved me.

Well, not in the way most guys confess they love a girl. But he said it in his own loveable, Rabb-like way.

And that's good enough for me. Because I, um, you know… I really love him too.

That's enough to make me wait for him no matter how long it takes. We may be stationed in different parts of the world, but he loves me and I love him and though I'll miss him and it will be a horrible hole in my life…

…those words he said to me and looking forward to his E-mails will make it worthwhile.

Yup, and besides, there are always those vacations.

I wonder what the weather is like in London in August?

And he already knows he's got a spare bedroom waiting for him anytime he's able to come for a visit.

I'm a Marine, I can handle this.

And he's Navy. Gotta love those dress whites and how they look on him. Those rear views will keep me occupied at those times I miss him most.

God, I feel like I'm seventeen again, talking on the phone with the Captain of the football team.

Only this Bruce Wayne respects me for who I am and doesn't just lust after my body.

Is it possible this is what true love is? Yes. After all this time, this is what I have missed out on.

Yep, we're gonna be fine.

Godspeed Flyboy, I'll talk with you soon. Is Tuesday at 1900 too forward?

I doubt it; he'll probably call me if I don't call him.

**- Finis**


End file.
